Five Part Series: "The Truth About Building Relationships”

Andy Andrews | October 1st, 2021

Part Three: Separating Yourself From the Crown

  • Purpose is to build relationships before people need a boat.  
  • They are getting to know you in a way they didn’t before
  • Then when they need a boat, they come to their kind, funny, witty friend they have found in you
  • Are we just supposed to fool people into liking us to buy a boat?
    • No, buying the boat is the bi-product of the relationship – no matter what role you are in 
    • Sales is just the funnel they will eventually go through when they do need a boat

  • This is good for others, but I am the way I am and people know it, if I change, will people think I’m weird
    • When we are changing how we respond, we will also end up changing the scenery

  • AA Story– family moved in the middle of High School
    • Was the best thing that ever happened to him
    • Everyone had watched him grow up where he had previously lived
      • Saw him go through the all the weird growing up phases – glasses, braces, etc. 
      • Disappeared into the crowd, but then he went through a glow up, to those friends, he seemed the same kid and remained invisible

  • The people in the new state didn’t know all the awkward things about him
    • He walked in as the new AA -no longer nervous and defeated but confident
    • Spotted the popular kids and quickly became friends with them through humor
    • Still friends with these people today
    • First impressions matter and are tough to change later
    • Be yourself may not always be the best advise
    • Fake it till you make it sounds wrong or dishonest 
    • But acting like you don’t have a headache isn’t wrong
    • Acting like your great in front of your child isn’t wrong
    • Putting your best foot forward is you putting the best version of yourself in front
    • Creates more accurate and longer lasting relationships
    • Reveals our true self

  • “When you’re having a first convo with someone you just met, don’t feel like you have to get right to business, just making a friend” 
    • Why is this important? Because you’re building the relationship
    • When you are away from your original workplace is the time to build traditional relationships, don’t even tell them what they do until they ask
    • Friends are not pushy with friends
    • When they need a boat, they will come straight to you

  • AA Story – planning to meet the main buyer for B&N, his publisher didn’t seem happy about it
    • AA was only the third author he asked to meet, the other didn’t and him didn’t get along and it hurt their careers
    • Went to NY, everyone was at the restaurant – publishing company looked really nervous
    • AA asked the buyer who his college football team was – he didn’t have one
    • He claimed the guy as an Alabama fan, told him about Roll Tide 
    • The guy smiled and said his boys liked Alabama – AA connected with him about the boys
    • Publisher started talking about his new book, AA interrupted and asked if he had a pro team – connected with him on football – said he would claim themselves as Giants fans 
    • Another publisher started talking numbers again
    • AA asked if he fished and what they do when they aren’t watching football – baseball
    • Another person chimed in with more business
    • AA and B&N stated connecting on baseball
    • Another person chimed in with more business
    • AA stopped them – said he had a couple of questions
      • “Do you know who he works for?”
      • “Do you know I write books?”
      • Ok, you guys know who he is and he knows I write books, if you’re here with me, he knows he can get books from you, now that we all know that, can we just talk to each other while we eat?”
      • Thick as Thieves after lunch
      • B&A asked if he was always like that, a month later all end caps in B&N held AA books free of charge 

  • Tiny things – huge impressions - When you’re talking to someone 
    • Really want to intro you to my CEO or family
    • Better way: honor the person right in front of you
    • I can’t wait for my family to meet you, can’t wait for my CEO to meet you

  • Do you know who you look like? (insert celebrity)
    • Better way: do you know who looks just like you? Insert celebrity
    • Honor people

  • Be the thermostat not a thermometer
    • Don’t adapt the temp – change the temp
    • Changed the atmosphere 

  • Learn some foreign phrases
    • Easily make people laugh when they don’t speak your language 
      • Learn three phrases that have nothing to do with each other